28/07/2010
Starting to settle into China now, and have realised that Shanghai is a big place. We discovered a new shopping centre a minutes walk away, which apparently is one of the western areas. This also meant we could get some non-Chinese food…… a Mexican burger in fact, it made a nice change knowing what to expect when the food was being served, and not having to ask for an additional bowl to put the bones of a foot into.
We found a hairdressers in the shopping mall nearby so I decided I needed to have a little chop. An American had advised us that ‘it’s totally a good hairdressers’, and that I should get my haircut with some bloke called ‘Seven’. I’ve come to the conclusion that they choose their names far too easily, and use poetic license when deciding how to spell it. (Met a ‘Paggy’, and ‘Minranda’ too) Anyway, they had no English, so he gave me a book of Chinese mens hair cuts to look at, to choose a similar one for me. Problem being I have a completely different hair type to Chinese hair, so we had to find another book, and just pick out a Western style for him to apply to me. Whilst searching through the books, I had a pair of hands on my back and shoulders doing some crazy things. I realised it was a massage; it lasted a good 20 minutes, but was highly relaxing. I was reassured by the fact that even in China, some of the ‘hairdressers’ are pissy little queens, just like we get in England. ‘Seven’ was nice enough though, despite constantly blowing loose hairs off of me, but also spraying me with a venomous soy sauce breathe! It was a tidy little shop though, and once where you’d expect to pay £30 plus in England. Luckily, this was only £6.80! (or the equivalent of £6.80)
After some sunshine for the first couple of days, we have seen no blue sky since, and I have been told not to expect to see blue sky until I go back to England. This is a shame, but it keeps the body temperature down, and the body odours at a minimum (not including the ones created from inside), unfortunately, this is a problem which will never get away from me. Furthermore, despite the copious amounts of food consumed so far, my body has struggled to process it into anything more than a Shredded Wheat! I feel I’ve given enough crude humour for one blog now so I’ll move on…. Despite the lack of sunshine, the locals still feel the need to walk around with umbrellas, because god forbid they expose their skin to some sunlight, and having a tan is certainly not craved over here. This means I’m constantly on ‘eye watch’, because them little pricks on the umbrellas aren’t far from making me lose an eyeball.
We had to visit head office on Monday to sign contracts, sort out schedules etc. But before we done any of this we had to have a ‘small interview’. This ended with having to construct a practise class to 3 people from the office. Stupidly, I picked out of the book the lesson on animals, and teaching the concept of what they can and can’t do. Rather than giving my own animals, I asked the ‘students’ what their favourite animal was, and thus had some difficulty in teaching them the actions of what the student does. Embarrassingly, I made bunny ears and hopped around the meeting room to explain a rabbit, I clawed my hands and roared when explaining a Tiger, and ‘Woofed’ at the 3 women when explaining a Dog. Their expressions weren’t hard to read (‘what the ****’). Also, as the lesson was meant to be about what they can, and can’t do, I naturally talked about what the can eat. Imagine how unimpressed the women were when my example for the women was that ‘Tigers ‘can’ eat humans’. (note to self- don’t use this example for the children). I have my first classes on Sunday, 9.30-12, pray for me!
Missing everyone from back home (well, the ones I like (love?)).
Until the next blog, traaaa.
I want an umbrella! I think I finally have a job, so am definitely there for new year!! Miss You!! and Dan! Keeping up to date with the blogs!! xxx